Return to Top Shop

It's safe to go back to Topshop. They've realised that middle-aged ladies about town have money to spend and like to look good. To be honest, where else can we go? We don't want to look like our mothers...not yet. What the designers for young girls have cottoned on to is that a three-quarter sleeve looks great on everyone and jeans are comfortable if the waist fits just above the navel. Exactly what we need too! They've also done something about sizes as I now fit a Top Shop 14 and they stock a few size 16's if you search for them.The thing to watch out for is Mutton-Dressed-As-Lamb-Syndrome (MDAL). If you hang around too long, you'll catch it. You'll know you've caught it if you start trying on all the pretty 'little girl' stuff just to see 'how it looks.' Trust me, it looks awful. Stick to the lovely cardis, jeans and trousers and you'll be okay.
Talking of sizes, I went into the Reiss sale. My batwing arms could barely open the door but I persisted and tried on a black dress, size 14, greatly reduced. I have eaten next to nothing since January and have lost ten pounds but it was far too small. It wouldn't zip up over the tummy. I was told that they don't stock size 16. Well, they're on the way out, as I complained to the sixth former who served me in Hobbs. She was sympathetic, unlike a young colleague at work who told me that some shops don't like to see their clothes being worn by older, erm fatter women. It spoils their image. Well, an image is worthless without customers. Middle-aged ladies about town have tummies because they've had babies or eaten too much cake at work, or both. Think about it...thirty years at work...how many colleagues birthdays? How much cake? We may have tummies and batwing arms but we also have money. So where are the clothes?